<< Back to the Index
 |
|
Day 4: Boundaries, not diets
|
|
|
|
Most people will say that "diets don't work". It's not the diet - it's the rigidity and perfectionist that we bring to the diet!
This all-or-nothing approach never works because when you are off your diet, you cancel out the progress you made while you were on it.
"If you're like most people, when you're on a diet, you try hard to follow it perfectly. Each day you strive to take in the exact number of calories, fat grams or carbohydrates allowed by the plan.
But if you slip up and eat a delicious (but forbidden) food, you figure you've blown it, so you might as well eat more."
Throw our rigid RULES and set BOUNDARIES, instead.
"Picture your diet program as a road or a path. You can define the boundaries of your diet road based on the number of calories, points, or other factors you choose to follow. As you walk on the road each day, your goal is to stay between the sides of the road. Unlike strict or rigid diet plans, boundaries stay flexible. They provide guidelines, but at the same time, they allow for common sense and good judgment."
During strong, focused times we walk on the road straight as an arrow, pulling in the boundaries close around us. On less focused days, times of stress or injury, maintenance, or simply "off" type days, we widen the boundaries, giving us room to breathe and meander a bit. But we REMAIN on the ROAD.
"Boundaries should give you benefits, not punishment! They should provide guidelines for you to live by, but not burden you with rules. You can define boundaries for any type of diet or weight-loss approach. Depending on your needs, you can simply adjust the edges of your plan to match where you are in life. By doing this, you'll be far more successful than if you punish yourself every time you step off the road."
Linda suggest making a two column list: narrow road and wider road. Under the narrow road, list your diet/eating/exercise plan. On the wider road, list your maintenance or looser guideline plan. Then decide on ways you can be flexible with them without losing sight of the healthy road you want to follow.
How about share one thing you'd list under the narrow road, and how you'd modify it or adjust it to fit under your wider road?
|
| |
Anonymous Replied:
Under my narrow road, I'd exercise 4 times a week. In my wider road, I'd drop it to 3.
This has been really helpful to read. Perfectionism is one road blocks I'm learning to let go of. This idea of a fluid boundary/border for my eating/exercise plan has really hit home!
|
| |
Ladybug Replied:
I think this has been a big factor in my success. I've learned that the diet has to work with my life which means I go to a restuarant or I eat a sweet. I can re-work each meal of the day to fit my craving or mood and, yet, stay within my daily guidelines. And, above all, I don't need to be perfect!!
|
| |
Anonymous Replied:
Great summary, Jenny.
I'm actually nearing day fifty on the '100 Days' but decided to go back and start again with everyone and wow -- I'd actually forgotten this one (my mind isn't what it used to be , ha!). It's a good one too! I struggle with trying to keep everything 'perfect' and have finally started to accept that it's not necessary for success.
Under my narrow road, I had to do the treadmill to feel as if I'd 'exercised' but with the wider road I accept that just being active is enough some days (whether its running around doing errands or walking or doing another sport -- it doesn't have to be something 'structured' .
I really like the tone of this lesson.
|
| |
Anonymous Replied:
Trying to be a perfect in any area of life can make you very neurotic and cause eating probs in itself. With the guidance that Linda gives we can become confident enough to let the road get wider or narrower depending on other influences going on in our lives - it becomes second nature after a while & is definitely the way forward for long term success. Strict diets/ too-tight boundaries will only work short term.
|
| |
Anonymous Replied:
This one helped me a lot when I read it months ago.
It showed me that I don't have to be perfect. I will have days where I eat more or don't exercise. That doesn't make me a failure. It means I'm human and I will have days when I don't follow my plan perfectly. It's all okay!
Narrow road - Stick to my calories and fiber amount for the day. All meals are on plan. Drink 96 oz water. Exercise for at least 30 minutes M-F.
Wide road - Can have 200 more calories that day. I don't have to pay attention to fiber or other nutrients so much. 32-64 oz water. 10 minutes exercise.
Extremely wide road for those hard days when I'm fighting a binge - One meal that I don't think about health or calories. But I do have to be calm and aware while eating, no shoveling food in while zoned out. A small chocolate concrete or a small vanilla frap. I can do one of the above but not all three. 
|
| |
Anonymous Replied:
Very good summary -
Narrow road - eat and exercise within all boundaries of plan perfect.
Wider road - know that if I dont' do it perfect that I am still doing something and still making a difference.
|
| |
Anonymous Replied:
In the past if I screwed up - yes, I would continue that screw up for months until my next diet phase then pick out a whole new diet claiming that the one I was on was just not working (lol) , but now I try to plan my day in advance, food intake, water and exercise, but if things stir-up a bit, I won't get all choked up about it but rather get back on track right away and take it from there - tracking here at SYD helped me do just that.
|
| |
Anonymous Replied:
I don't see my narrow road as a set thing or my wider road as something to be done during maintenance, I get the best of both worlds not. Sometimes on a wider road for a longer leg which is usually better for me but I know if I do fall into a wider road, I should get back to the narrow one sooner than later. Each day my road can vary in my mind and some days I act on it but most days thankfully I dont.
Lately my road has rubber walls which have been bouncing me immediately back into the straight and narrow.
|
| |
Brenda Replied:
On the narrow road there are no stops for baked goodies or ice cream. On the wider road I may have 1 or 2 servings a week without messing up my plan. You notice I said 1-2 servings a WEEK and not per DAY. That's something I'm totally having fights with myself about.
Great summary Jen!
|
| |
Anonymous Replied:
The 1st time I did the 100 days, I wrote that I didn't feel that I could have a wide road because I would lose track and find it hard to get back on track BUT I've since learned that I can have a wide road and still lose weight and live a healthy lifestyle.
My narrow road is exericse every day and log & blog every day as well.
My wide road is to exercise at least 5 days a week & not worry about logging on the weekends.
|
| |
seceretgarden (Susan) Replied:
My narrow road is THE PALEO WAY OF EATING!
The road gets wider the more i eat the 'wrong foods'.
The road i'm on now has got a lot of lanes on it - super wide!
|
| |
Anonymous Replied:
I am on day 4 today! I am so proud that I have kept up with the challenge and my "good" eating habits. Yesterday I went over totally by accident but I tried to follow a less rigid thinking that I normally would have done. I was only off by 200 calories but to me it was not acceptable. I think day 4 came at a good time, lol. I did decide to keep on track and not to sweat the extra cals for yesterday. So my narrow road is to follow all that SYD has to offer and my wide is to be relaex enough to know its ok if I take some time to learn how to do eat healthy.
|
| |
pickles a smaller me Replied:
perfect plan,makes a lot of sense,thanks
|
| |
Anonymous Replied:
Really liked this article.
|
|