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100 days restart - Day 4: Boundaries, not diets

Jenn J

Post your thoughts on todays reading.

  Jenn J Replied:

Day 4: Boundaries, not diets

You've probably heard people say that diets are bad for you and that you should "never diet again!" In truth, the problem isn't usually with diets themselves, but with the rigid, perfectionistic ways we use them.

If you're like most people, when you're on a diet, you try hard to follow it perfectly. Each day you strive to take in the exact number of calories, fat grams or carbohydrates allowed by the plan.

But if you slip up and eat a delicious (but forbidden) food, you figure you've blown it, so you might as well eat more. Soon you throw the entire diet out the window. This all-or-nothing approach never works because when you are off your diet, you cancel out the progress you made while you were on it.

Boundaries define your diet

Like it or not, to lose weight, you have to follow some type of system. Your plan can be quite rigid and meticulous, or as simple as deciding you'll eat less and increase your level of exercise. Instead of getting stuck on the word diet, learn to think of it as boundaries for your eating plan.

Picture your diet program as a road or a path. You can define the boundaries of your diet road based on the number of calories, points, or other factors you choose to follow. As you walk on the road each day, your goal is to stay between the sides of the road. Unlike strict or rigid diet plans, boundaries stay flexible. They provide guidelines, but at the same time, they allow for common sense and good judgment.

During times when you're strong and focused on your diet, you move the boundaries closer together, making the road narrower. When you take a break from your program or work on maintenance, you widen the boundaries and allow more variety in your plan. But even on a really bad day, you never eliminate the road or get off of it completely.

Set guidelines, not rules

Boundaries should give you benefits, not punishment! They should provide guidelines for you to live by, but not burden you with rules. You can define boundaries for any type of diet or weight-loss approach. Depending on your needs, you can simply adjust the edges of your plan to match where you are in life. By doing this, you'll be far more successful than if you punish yourself every time you step off the road.

  Jenn J Replied:

In your notebook, draw a line down the middle of the page, creating two columns.

Label one column "Narrow road," for your actual diet plan. Label the other "Wider road," for your maintenance or alternate eating plan.

Under the titles, define your eating and exercise plans for each of these roads. Then decide on ways you can be flexible with them without losing sight of the healthy road you want to follow.

  Lyn💛 Replied:

I'm pretty good at honoring the wider road when it is called for and then going right back to the narrow road. That is...when I am on the road...sometimes I get so far off track I can't even see the road. LOL

  Jenn J Replied:

Lyn, I have repeatedly gone off the "road" and find it hard to get back. This time I am really committed to this weight loss. My real focus is on keeping my sugars to as low an intake as possible, and moderate carb intake. So far, based on my weight loss, I think the cut in sugar has had a really good impact.

I had chemo in 2015 and just last week I was looking back at my blood labs taken at each chemo session and each post chemo visit. My blood glucose has varied between 100 and 120. My next visit is May 2nd and my goal is to have my nonfasting blood glucose under 100, and as much weight loss as possible.

This Narrow road and Wider road is something I need to be very aware of. The last two nights, just before bed, I've allowed myself one piece of candy to satisfy my sugar taste. By allowing myself this one piece, it lets me focus the rest of the day on staying on the narrow road. I take a tiny detour each night and I find that I'm really enjoying the one piece.

  Rjaatt Replied:

Lyn, Fast, its not hard, all you have to do is just make your last meal at 3pm. its really is that simple and the rest of the night just have infusion water, if your stomach growls just get up and walk a little or take a shower, or do some exercising. or if need be then eat a hand full of Nuts, or if your allergic to them then you can have a Protein Shake. at 5pm. Go look at my Lipid tests It shows the Proof that I lowered everything.... by 75%. Sending love and Hugs... to both of you...

This is my Food and Sugar intake today: I only eat 300 calories but the site allows only 600
237 Calories
Goal: 600 Remaining: 363
0.7 Fat (g)
Goal: 20 Remaining: 19.3
37.1 Carbs (g)
Goal: 85 Remaining: 48
2.1 Fiber (g)
Goal: 10 Remaining: 7.9

I have been eating 300 to 700 for the last 15months... I pretty much stay to the same foods and same drinks. even when everyone else is eating what they want, I just make sure that I eat what I know my body needs to survive. People never ate that much only one meal a day back 8000 yrs ago.. Sometimes they went days with out eating.. So when I did my research I found that they would have to search for food and walk over 20miles a day.. since our life style can not handle that, I supplement with vitamins. If you want to lose the weight Ask your Doctor for a B-12 shot and have him check your Vit intake. that will tell everything you need to know. to lose weight.

B12 is among the most important for weight control. If you want to lose excess weight, vitamin B12 has been linked to weight loss and energy enhancing. ... Vitamin B12 also helps the body convert fats and proteins into energy

  Rjaatt Replied:

P.s. I must keep on a Narrow Plan, the moment I go to a Wider Plan I personalty just caused myself to over eat. It allows me to have things I know will lead me down a road of no return. I have been on that road many times in 11yrs or since I was 10yrs old.. Now I stay focused and don't deture off my road, a boulder or pebbles might get in my way but I just pick them up or go around them. I don't let them stop me on my progress... I have a goal and I am not budging from this goal.. I have a dream and I will get married if its the last thing I do in life. I have the right to be Happy!

  Lyn💛 Replied:

I typically follow a fasting window where I eat for 8 hours (or less) and abstain for 16 hours (or more). But if I have true hunger I honor my body. I also eat mostly vegan so I take a B12 supplement daily.

  Rjaatt Replied:

While you lyn have been doing this for so much longer then all of us, that is supportive, I think your the one 15months ago that told me this information, It looks familiar so I do think you did tell me when I first started and that is why I Told my Doctor that I needed the shot... Gee Your the BEST!

  flower Replied:

My narrow road eliminates sugar except for natural sugar in organic fruits and vegetables and when I go to the wider road and eat a sugar laden product I don`t even like the way it leaves my mouth tasting and my scale shows a 1- 3 # gain , so my body is telling me NO I don`t like this and do not want it so I have learned to finally listen that sugar is not good for me.

  Rjaatt Replied:

Flower I had to learn the same thing, My mother at a young age would allow me to walk down to the store 2 blocks away with $25.00 and I could buy what ever I wanted all the candy and coke my heart desired. To her it was a gift and to me it was a comatose stage.

As I returned we would sit infront of the tv in Hermosa Beach 8thplace and in our little house above Cassy's Carlot. I would look out the window and look at all the sailboats, and also watch cartoons.

I would run around the house and jump on the furniture, I would scream and laugh and pound on the doors, I would throw things in the air and I could do what ever I wanted to do by bedtime at 6:30pm I would be so warn out. While my dear mother cleaned the house and at 4am in the morning she was still cleaning house. Gee What did I learn as a Wife?

My great grandmother would leave Sugar Cubes on the Table and the first thing I did when I visited was dash through that door and scarf them down.

When I was married I didn't allow any candy and my kids were deprived, enough that my son learned to steal from the stores and hid the candy in the water heater, and my daughter when she went to her grandmothers would also steel pack of gum out of her grandmotehrs draws. Sad to say what did they learn? From me...

What is really sad is now my daughter keeps candy in the house and tons of it and my grandchild has access to it and she SNEAKS it and hides it in her bed, in her books the wrappers, in the closet, in the bathroom... What is my Daughter teaching her daughter and yet it all started with me. I stared it with my FreeWill...

  Jeanne- CE! Replied:

I really like the ideas of boundaries and the wider and narrower road. I think of myself as always being on the wellness road, just on different areas of it; all a part of my wellness for life. I have been in Maintenance for almost nine years now, largely because of this site, and because after much trial and error and many tweaks, I found my plan that was joyous and doable for life. Fads and quick fixes do not work for me at all, and I've tried many! I am a fan of Tosca Reno and her Eat-Clean books- some more strict than others. My plan is kind of a sliding scale in that I walk a narrow to moderate road almost all of the time but I do allow special treats in moderation.

The opinions expressed on this forum may not represent the opinions of Please consult your physician to determine the weight, nutrition and exercise levels that are best for you.